1. |
||||
|
In the graying whirlpool of my thinking
I still do not know if I am gleaning anything
I cannot see colors like before
They seeped into the wood-grain like my secret blood
|
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2. |
||||
|
Unable to fumigate a latent past (flowery and misted over)
Invested too much in this idea of a vessel
I am flesh and the abuse that I carry
To,
Forced consumption, time slippage
Jarred awake by my dreaming
|
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3. |
||||
|
(excerpts from Mei-Mei Berssenbrugge's "Empathy")
|
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4. |
||||
|
I'm piercing through this fever dream by the skin of my teeth
With a weight adhered (by the glowering, bound by small talk)
The gates that keep rusting, over interrupted territory, glassy eyes and their attraction fields and the filth that is orbiting
Empty feelings, glazing over, cyclically
|
||||
5. |
||||
6. |
||||
|
Weaving through the brush in this gravitation
Broken door-frame, two decades vibrating
|
||||
7. |
||||
|
I wanna say as much as I can
I wanna stick it to the man
I wanna show you I’m okay
I wanna laugh in someone’s face
Do you know I know what you’ve been through?
Went to a meeting to get in the news
A common place to agree
That makes me so happy
So why are you so upset?
It’s got good as it gets
I mean everybody has been saved
me and my friends are gonna come to the gay parade
The times have gotten pretty neat
There’s people out on the street
just fighting as a big part of an attack
and I don’t wanna be a part of all that racket.
You make me feel like a commodity
You make me feel like I’m a marketing scheme
You make me feel like I have got to praise
a fucking float on Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade
I wanna take all of your dirty try and make it clean
Everybody looks better without the teeth
I always wanted a friend like that
I love watching you giggle on the TV set
We need your vote and money for the ever-holy DNC
It gets better when you just sit there and believe
Throwing crumbs onto concrete flooring
now everybody gets the dream of three kids and a corgi
You make me feel like a commodity
You make me feel like I’m a marketing scheme
You make me feel like I have got to praise
a fucking float on Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade
|
||||
8. |
i'm trying
02:32
|
|||
|
Close your eyes and let yourself relax for a little while
Forget the big decisions don’t obsess on time
Leave the hurting for when it’s really not okay
Do not worry, you’re gonna make it anyway
I can feel you staring back at me from many miles
Can I ever do enough to summon up your smile
Keep in mind that the future’s closer than I think
I am trying to be the person you want me to be
|
||||
9. |
paranoid
03:12
|
|||
|
Last night I saw you weeping in my dreams
Black teardrops diving for the bed
And I stood back silent
Am I a stranger standing in your room?
The late one watching your ascent
Should I stand back, silent?
Are you my sister, am I just a boy
who tags along till I am spent
Am I really part of it?
So should I wait and gaze upon the screen?
Should I look for a source of blame?
And why should I be afraid?
I’m feeling like I’m paranoid these days
I’m stuck on thoughts of going separate ways
I know it’s all in my head
Just forget about it
I know there’s nothing wrong, it’s just misplaced
Suspicion of a quite cold disgrace
wish I could just give it a rest
I’ll give it my best
Do I occupy a certain space?
Am I a thought to be dismissed?
Do I own an adjective?
In the future I will have replaced
the feeling with another bliss
but it is always different
I’m feeling like I’m paranoid these days
I’m stuck on thoughts of going separate ways
I know it’s all in my head
Just forget about it
I know there’s nothing wrong, it’s just misplaced
Suspicion of a quite cold disgrace
wish I could just give it a rest
I’ll give it my best
|
||||
10. |
you're my favorite
03:12
|
|||
|
Coca Cola poster on colored walls
piles of pants and tee shirts line the halls
I could still be sitting in the dark
wondering what all of that
talk of cars and menthol really was
15 CDs waiting to be spun
16 songs on each wait to be sung
It never ceased to thrill me just to cruise
Singing 240 tunes
about the lack of things to do
Should’ve been a bit more scared to change my pace
And even though it falls apart, it falls in place
I don’t wanna come between it
I’ll miss you and I mean it
You’re my favorite person of them all
|
||||
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